I'm a Parent and I'm Happy! I'm starting a new trend...

I found myself shaking my head while reading the following article today:  Parents Who Hate Parenting

Really?  An article saying the latest trend is being a parent and hating it?

All I could think of is all the different types of people in my life...

• My brother has a newborn... and happily gives up a Friday night on the town.  He is the happiest that he's ever been.  
• My sister has older kids and her world revolves around them.  I actually worry about her when they are older and she no longer has them to fill her house and her life on a daily basis.
• I have friends and cousins expecting babies after years of trying... believe me that they are all looking forward to the day they hold their child in their arms.  
• Both my Grandmothers are in their 80's and live alone.  Their world brightens when they get a phone call from one of their children or grandchildren.  I do not want to imagine what their life would be like right now if they never had children.
• I know single mother's who are happy as can be... honestly, I've never heard them complain.  Only gush with pride.
• I also know people who are looking forward to the time in their life when they do have kids.  They wish it was now but are waiting for everything else to fall into place first. 

The following was quoted in the article:

"Parents of young children report far more depression, emotional distress, and other negative emotions than non-parents, and parents of grown children have no better well-being than adults who never had children," 

I challenge the author of this article to interview either of my Grandmother's about their 'well-being' and if it is related to their children... Even Joan Rivers has given up her place in Manhattan to move closer to her daughter and grandson in California because "Family is everything".  

As a parent of young children, I won't lie to you.  My life has changed.  Tommy and I have had far more arguments post children.  I have laid awake at night worrying about money, trying to figure out the best way to allocate our income to pay for everything we want to do... vacations, college, landscaping, etc...  I have been reduced to tears when the kids don't take their usual 2 hour naps, therefore depriving me of my own nap.  I have gagged when cleaning up puke.  I've been embarrassed when one of them throws a fit in the grocery store.  I feel judged by other people when my children don't listen to me.  Of course, I feel tired most of the time.  

BUT... I've never felt un-happy.  

How could I feel unhappy when...

• Abby climbs into bed with me and in the morning she wakes me up by saying "It's a pretty day, Mom".  
• George sees me come into the room and runs as fast as he can with a huge smile and outstretched arms towards me?
• When they were infants sometimes they would cry and cry and all they wanted was for me to hold them.  How is that not the best feeling in the world?
• When I leave for work (walk down the stairs) Abby and George run to the gate at the top of the stairs to give me a kiss and wave bye bye.  Sometimes they cry because they don't want me to leave.  

Whenever I start to feel overwhelmed with parenting, I realize that the feeling is just me missing my old creature comforts.  I miss sleeping in.  I miss watching an entire show on tv which I can actually hear what they are saying.  I miss sitting down for an entire dinner.  I also miss hanging out with my high school friends and playing volleyball.  But, that doesn't make me hate my current life.  It doesn't make me wish I never had children.  Remembering your past, reminiscing about yesterday isn't unusual or bad.  It's life!   

So, to all those parents out there who think they are depressed and 'hate parenting', I say to you...

BUCK UP and GROW UP!  

Stop finding the negative and focus on the positive.  You are probably the same person who would be crying if you couldn't have children. Everyone has issues, worries and stress... with or without kids.   Realize what you have is a wonderful gift and enjoy every second of it!

When I do get time to watch an entire show or sit down for an entire dinner, I actually miss my kids.  I don't feel right without them.  Seriously, ask my husband ;-)

Abby and George,

Mommy and Daddy chose to have you.  

George, we initially thought you were a little early, but now we  know you were right on time. 

With the two of you we have formed an amazing family.

Being a strong family requires hard work and that shouldn't be seen as 'an economical and emotional drain', but a foundation for everything wonderful to come. 

None of us are perfect, but each day we try our best and that is all we ask of you in return. 

Love, 

Mom&Dad